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December 2nd, 2010

02:02 am - only5
 It's been ages since I last posted. Been pretty involved in fandom recently and I really need to rant, so hi again, livejournal. ^^

Cassiopeia is crumbling from within.

It's scary how these are the people who promised support no matter what, some of these wonderful people are going against each other, leaving us. There's been so much going on that's against our boys and we can't even stand up for them because we're falling apart. We can't even protect ourselves now, with all the hooha going on.

I might not be someone important and crucial to Cassiopeia but at least I know that whatever differences we may have in our beliefs, we should stand together, more united now than ever before. This red ocean has given me so much strength and warmth these past  years, we've made so many memories together. Is it really the time to give it all up? Putting aside our beliefs might not be easy, who's to say which side really is at fault? We weren't there when it all happened. The only thing we can do is rely on our memories and thoughts of the boys who have given us so much joy. It may not have been a smooth journey to the top, but that's where we are now.

If we let something like this affect our strength, how will they trust us again? To them, we will just be people who left them when they were down, coming back only during their good times. What'll differentiate us from other fanclubs then? We go all out to protect our boys, never mind the consequences. Think about what made you tick with love and reignite the flame of your passion, always keep the faith.

The boys have been working hard, pursuing their own activities and excelling because they are the gods. HoMin are coming back with the name TVXQ, it might not be the wisest choice but at least they're doing what they can to keep the name fresh in people's memories in this fickle market. JYJ are on holiday right now but, a world tour? I haven't seen them so happy in ages.

These are people we've shed tears for, people who we've laughed with, people who tug at our heart strings every time they glance at us, people who make our hearts ache whenever they're tired or injured, these are people we actually care about and love. People who say things like, “Our friendship is stronger than all else because we’re breathing the same air, speaking the same thoughts, and living one dream.”, “Only when the five of us are together can we be called TVXQ.”, “If anyone is to leave TVXQ, I will go back to being a regular high school student.”, "We aren’t members, we’re brothers. We fight a lot, too. But we make up really quickly.", “When the five of our voices come together, there is a special something there. That is something that I know.” and "I want to live for TVXQ, die for TVXQ, the precious reason for my existence. If I hadn’t become a part of TVXQ, I can’t imagine what I would be like now. Without TVXQ, I wouldn’t be like myself, who I am today." can't have been living a lie for the last 9 years.

I am without right or ability to tell the detractors what's right or wrong but I'm sure that deep within, they're acting this way because they're lost and scared. Holding on isn't easy but if we don't hold on together, what are the boys going to come back to? Half a fanclub? As Cassiopeia, isn't it our duty to stand by them whenever and whatever? To hold their hands and reassure them that it'll all be okay and that when they return stronger than before, we'll already be here waiting with open arms? 

How can we have forgotten all this? Watching them grow and mature, loving them with all our hearts, of this how could we let go? I miss them so much. The stage is empty when it's not five, the songs sound hollow and the dances are awkward. Only if we stay together can we proudly say that whatever the result, at the end, at least we tried to defend what we knew was right and ours.

I want to see you.
Current Location: In my bed trying to sleep, yes.
Current Mood: fandom-emo
Current Music: HUG - 동방신기

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